OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
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