we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
Randomize
