Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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