If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
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