okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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