who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Randomize
