dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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