she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
I think my moral compass just broke
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