I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Randomize
