This dress was meant to end up on your floor
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize