Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Randomize
