her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Randomize
