I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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