For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
Randomize
