I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
I think my vagina is haunted
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
The uberlube is also flammable
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
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