3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip πππ
Your skills amaze me
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