Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
A bitchslap is in order.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
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