high people should be assigned attendants
I forgot how hot balto sounded
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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