Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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