He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
Ladies don't puke and tell
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize