Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
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