she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Randomize
