im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
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