Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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