We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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