do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
Randomize
