I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
