I really wish I could go back in time to change the course of events that led to me sitting on the internet at 3 Googling 'Traumatic masturbation' while talking to you about failed dates, and running a virtual restaurant in a video game.
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.