i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
