why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
Dick very happy bro
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
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