I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
Hello Officers/Paramedics, judging by last night, my friend is dead. The money in his pockets is mine, he owed me. Please send me directions to whichever morgue/strip club for pick up.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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