so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
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