Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Randomize
