Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
tell me about the fingering
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
Randomize