I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
If I had a nickel for every time I've used a condom, I'd have... two nickels.
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
Randomize
