he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Randomize
