your thong is hanging out like whoa
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Randomize