no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
Randomize
