his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Randomize