DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
These 27 C*ck Blocks Are Savage AF
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.