My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
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