why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Randomize
