i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Randomize
