i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
