oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Randomize