you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize