When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
Randomize
