would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
