Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
should my penis look like a turkey
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
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