Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize
